Dating before marriage is essential. It helps the individual to make the decision whether or not he wants to live with the other person for the rest of his life. Dating before marriage is usually referred to as courtship, because the relationship has moved beyond the stage of simply getting to know each other, but has conditioned it towards marriage. The controversy surrounding dating and marriage has been around for a while now, with some people defending it, and others opposing it all together. However, going on dates leading to marriage or not is still quite common. This indicates that it is still suitable for the majority of people. When planning marriage, there are a variety of reasons why premarital dating is necessary, and these include:
First, dating before marriage helps you understand your partner better so that you can get along with a minimum of conflict. The merger of two people from diverse backgrounds is likely to bring with it a lot of ups and downs, so it is best to go through the struggles before marriage, to see if you can handle them before marriage.
Second, when dating with the main goal of marriage, it helps the couple focus on what they should expect in the marriage. This focus will help you assess whether or not you are ready for marriage, and the responsibilities that come with it. There are some couples who, while dating before marriage, realize that they are not compatible with each other and end the relationship before marriage.
Third, an understanding of each other’s likes and dislikes is more likely to be discovered when dating before marriage. The more you understand your partner, the more likely you are to be able to get along better with the marriage. During this courtship period, you will learn what you can handle, and what characteristics you won’t be able to live with.
Fourth, the future plans and ambitions of the couple when dating before marriage are discovered while discussing various aspects of their lives. Most of the time, each partner’s plans and even ambitions may differ because they lead an individual life. However, as the courtship progresses, it is important to be aware of the possibility of coordinating future plans, so that you have the same focus.
Fifth, dating before marriage strengthens the relationship because of the different life situations that the couple has to go through together while preparing for marriage. In these life situations, you see your partner as he is, and his ability to deal with various situations that may also arise in the marriage. However, for some couples, these situations open their eyes to the realities of life they are likely to live in the marriage and they choose to opt out.
Consequences of not dating before marriage
Even with the importance of dating before marriage being emphasized in various types of publications and married people, there are still couples who decide to give up on dating and just get married. The most obvious consequence of not dating before marriage is divorce. Many people who are now divorced, may not have dated before making the decision to marry, and find that they are unable to take on the responsibilities of marriage or live with the person they married.
Another consequence of not dating before walking down the aisle is that you are not aware of the point of marriage. Lack of focus on the direction of marriage is likely to lead to conflict because everyone has their own life that they want to live within marriage. A marriage without a common goal is likely to fall apart at the first sign of trouble.
In addition, friendship in dating develops over time, and it cannot take place without courtship between two people. Friendship is important in a marriage because there are times when the feelings of love will not be there, but because you are friends, there are other points of contact.
In general, dating before marriage is important and should not be neglected if the marriage is to have a chance of survival.